Jamaica Inn mumble mumble

Jamaica Inn is one of Daphne du Maurier's best loved books. Published in 1936 it tells the tale of a young girl who moves to the inn on Bodmin Moor and falls in love with a local smuggler.

It came as something of a surprise when the BBC announced that part of their new production of Jamaica Inn was going to be filmed in Kirkby Lonsdale. Lovely though Kirkby is, one of the things it is most famous for is not resembling either Jamaica or Cornwall. However the Beeb crew turned up, took over the square and dressed it up to look like Launceston, much to the outrage of residents of the real Launceston.

The drama was broadcast last week. You may have noticed the fuss. Millions complained that the actors were mumbling incoherently. "Technical problems," said the BBC, implying someone had forgotten to plug in a microphone. "Producer problems," retorted BECTU the technicians' union, which may have more credence given that even the new director general Tony Hall has complained of muffled dialogue in BBC dramas.

It made a good subject for the Westmorland Gazette cartoon. You can see my suggestions below and discover which made the front page by visiting my website here.

And on the subject of the front page, my cartoon has now been running in the Westmorland Gazette for 30 years. Not the same one, obviously, as even I have to think of a new joke now and again. You can read Katie Dickenson's story here and revisit some of my favourite cartoons here.

The Illustrated Finale pt 2

From 6.00 p.m. BST today I'll be illustrating the winning lines in The Society of Authors Twitter short story Grand Finale.

Neil Gaiman's opening line will be posted at 6 p.m. BST. Using the #soatale search tag, you can tweet a suggested next line until 6.30 (you can have as many goes as you like). I'll illustrate the opening line on this blog and it will appear shortly after 6.30.

At 7.00 the winning line goes up and again, when entries close at 7.30, I'll post an illustration. The final line goes live at 10.00l. Good luck and I hope I illustrate one of  YOUR lines!

You can see the results from this morning's Twitterthon here.

Neil Gaiman's FIRST LINE :  "Quick," he said. "Drink." The nightmare tasted like velvet and purple and volcanoes in her mouth. She sipped, and reality dissolved. #SoAtale

LINE 2 FROM @valmote : He repeated the ritual again until all 7 were under. No one putting up a fight. He wasn't surprised. This is what they paid him for. 

LINE 3 FROM  @Gem_Clair  :  Pocketing their cash, he took his real pay before they woke; a memory, a fear, a touch of desire from the girl. He drank them in. #SoAtale

LINE 4 FROM  @doug_said :  Suddenly the remembrance of a long-forgotten flavor touched his soul. Pained, he looked at her more closely. #soatale

FINAL LINE FROM  @janjonesauthor :  #SoAtale She didn't move. An Adept of the Nine Realms didn't have to. She opened her terrible mind and drank him in. And she laughed.

The Illustrated Finale

From 11 a.m. BST on today I'll be illustrating the winning lines in The Society of Authors Twitter short story Grand Finale.


Neil Gaiman's opening line will be posted at 11 a.m. BST. Using the #soatale search tag, you can tweet the next line until 11.30. Whilst the judges are judging, I'll illustrate the opening line here.


At 12.00 the winning line goes up and again, when entries close at 12.30, I'll post an illustration. The final line goes live at 3.00 so there are 5 lines and 5 illustrations in all. Good luck and I hope I illustrate one of YOUR lines!




The FIRST LINE:  I didn't expect the God of Thunder to live in Clapham. I definitely didn't expect to learn it from a card in a newsagent's window. #SoAtale

2nd LINE by Naomi_Adams: He opened the door unshaved wearing one sock, and a pair of pants as silent lightning streaked across the blackened sky. #soatale

'3rd LINE by @Laura_E_James : Flu,' he mumbled. 'Bad head. Shh.' I walked in and waited for my eyes to adjust to the darkness. 'There.' He pointed. I looked. #soatale

4th LINE by @will_lefleming :Strewn across the floor: leather breastplates and swords. A pair of wings hanging by the stairs. 'You know what to do,' he said #soatale

5th & LAST LINE by @stroodlights : He told me of the curse,but who cares about that when you're the new Thunder God? I soared, and filled the sky with fire and music. #soatale

GRAND FINALE PART 2 - Join the Society of Authors again at 6pm tonight for the start of the SECOND short story by Neil Gaiman. And I'll be back here doing cartoons of the winning lines.