Invasion of the Hordes

A bit of a mixed bag rich variety of stories lined up in the cartoonist’s sights this week.

The silliest is to do with Ulverston carnival. Wet sponges have been banned for health and safety reasons. Apparently they are used for throwing at people who volunteer to go in the stocks. (Why would anyone volunteer to go in the stocks? Is not the sad, mental decline of such folk a bigger story?) Anyway, sponges can pick up grit so they’re tooooo dangerous to throw.

Another sort of danger also reared its head. Tesco is threatening local Ambleside shops by opening a Tesco Express. In Bristol, earlier this year, such a move provoked riot. I suspect in South Lakes there may be Severe Tutting and a couple of letters to The Westmorland Gazette.

And finally, a horde of Viking treasure worth millions has been found in Furness. I'm off to dig up the garden. Meanwhile, you can see which cartoon graces the front page by visiting my website at www.shelbourn.com/gazette